I’m glad Tim and Carol got what they wanted but its a little sad that Carol missed all the little baby / hands-on time for 5 years. And they must have had to pay for day care during those 5 years on top of the high mortgage. Many couples seem to decide that the wife will go back to work when the child starts school but Carol did it the other way around. The good point is that they are happy with the decision. I had a wise older woman tell me as a new wife “Always try to live as if you have to live on one income incase one gets sick or a job plays out.” Wise words but most can’t or don’t chose to live by them.
Good article, Matt. When my daughter was born I was working for a consulting company – the hours were long, but the work was challenging, the employees were great, and the pay was high. The catch was there wasn’t going to be a means to ensure that I would not spend a majority of my time on the road.
Two days ago my daughter turned 18 and in August she is moving out of state to attend college. I’m so glad I was able to be around most evenings, summers, etc…, even though my total life-time earnings won’t be what it could have been (I’m not intending to offend any “road warriors” – just sharing that money isn’t the only thing to consider).
Thanks for sharing such a great example, Ken. I’m sure it was hard to resist the bigger paycheck and maybe added prestige, and it may have been tempting to justify sticking with that job as a way of providing well for your family. But I’m sure the added time together has proven to be a better form of provision.
It reminds me of a friend who’s a pilot for a major airline. He turned down many opportunities to move up to captain, choosing to remain co-pilot because he had better control over his schedule. It was only after his kids were off to college that he took the promotion.
As you said at the end, it isn’t to criticize anyone who chooses differently, but the time/money trade-off is a great example of a decision that can require a lot of courage to work through authentically.
Great piece Matt about bring courage forward to our daily decisions. Both large and small. I was shopping in Costco last night and three or four or maybe five times I was looking at something, holding it, even put it into the cart when for some reason I paused and asked myself the hard question: Do I really need this!? I sure as heck wanted it but thought – in each case- I have at least an acceptable version of this product at home. I didn’t need to necessarily get “the better model” I was looking at. Nice, but it would have just been more stuff. So I focused on the 3 simple things I did go there for!
Not necessarily pure ‘courage’ but it took a lot of will to move through that process. And it felt so good afterwards and I came home appreciating all that I do have. And I look forward to a future shopping trip to that store as other – real – needs arise!
That’s a great point, Mark, about how it takes courage to manage all the daily temptations to spend money on this or that and stay true to what we can actually afford or what matters most. It definitely takes courage to swim against the stream of our consumer culture. And what a great outcome — that it felt so good later to have made those decisions.
I’m glad Tim and Carol got what they wanted but its a little sad that Carol missed all the little baby / hands-on time for 5 years. And they must have had to pay for day care during those 5 years on top of the high mortgage. Many couples seem to decide that the wife will go back to work when the child starts school but Carol did it the other way around. The good point is that they are happy with the decision. I had a wise older woman tell me as a new wife “Always try to live as if you have to live on one income incase one gets sick or a job plays out.” Wise words but most can’t or don’t chose to live by them.
Michelle near Memphis
Good article, Matt. When my daughter was born I was working for a consulting company – the hours were long, but the work was challenging, the employees were great, and the pay was high. The catch was there wasn’t going to be a means to ensure that I would not spend a majority of my time on the road.
Two days ago my daughter turned 18 and in August she is moving out of state to attend college. I’m so glad I was able to be around most evenings, summers, etc…, even though my total life-time earnings won’t be what it could have been (I’m not intending to offend any “road warriors” – just sharing that money isn’t the only thing to consider).
Thanks for sharing such a great example, Ken. I’m sure it was hard to resist the bigger paycheck and maybe added prestige, and it may have been tempting to justify sticking with that job as a way of providing well for your family. But I’m sure the added time together has proven to be a better form of provision.
It reminds me of a friend who’s a pilot for a major airline. He turned down many opportunities to move up to captain, choosing to remain co-pilot because he had better control over his schedule. It was only after his kids were off to college that he took the promotion.
As you said at the end, it isn’t to criticize anyone who chooses differently, but the time/money trade-off is a great example of a decision that can require a lot of courage to work through authentically.
Great piece Matt about bring courage forward to our daily decisions. Both large and small. I was shopping in Costco last night and three or four or maybe five times I was looking at something, holding it, even put it into the cart when for some reason I paused and asked myself the hard question: Do I really need this!? I sure as heck wanted it but thought – in each case- I have at least an acceptable version of this product at home. I didn’t need to necessarily get “the better model” I was looking at. Nice, but it would have just been more stuff. So I focused on the 3 simple things I did go there for!
Not necessarily pure ‘courage’ but it took a lot of will to move through that process. And it felt so good afterwards and I came home appreciating all that I do have. And I look forward to a future shopping trip to that store as other – real – needs arise!
Courage – to see what is r e a l . So important…
That’s a great point, Mark, about how it takes courage to manage all the daily temptations to spend money on this or that and stay true to what we can actually afford or what matters most. It definitely takes courage to swim against the stream of our consumer culture. And what a great outcome — that it felt so good later to have made those decisions.